Thursday, March 02, 2006

The search for the perfect man (Part Three)

Mr F-M

When you phoned me just before Christmas, wanting me to come down to Heathrow, I said that I needed something more from you before I could do anything crazy like that again. So you drove up to me. Although it was good to see you, that wasn't really what I meant. I meant I needed to see a change to the pattern of things to help me feel it would be worthwhile opening myself up all over again. If you'd have kept to your word about getting a laptop & communicating more regularly to see "how things go", it would have been a step forward. But it's all just the same thing routine, isn't it? I mean, last week you sent that email suggesting you ring to arrange to come round and I've still heard nothing again.

So we're now in March and we've passed my deadline of seeing how things go. I know you mean everything you say at the time (well I think you do, anyway), but what is the point in saying it if nothing transpires? As the man says " What we think, or what we know, or what we believe is, in the end, of little consequence. The only consequence is what we do." You're clearly comfortable enough in your life not to want to rock the boat any more, and time is going by too quickly for me. I'm getting on with my life.

I guess I'm saying that I don't want to hear any more about how much you think about me and how much you love me, unless you can show me the evidence of it. And I'm not feeling in the slightest angry, just rather sad that I'm fast approaching the point of becoming bored with the same old routine.
There was a point when I really believed you loved me, but I don't think you do any more. Probably not for some time. Anyway, I miss the times we used to spend together, both in real life and online, but those times are so rare now. Maybe the time has just passed.

Take care
love Ginny xxxx

9 Comments:

Blogger Kim Ayres said...

Just a quick e-mail to thank you for taking the time to comment on my blog. I've been taking a look around yours and have been enjoying it. I'll be back again :)

5:04 pm  
Blogger WDKY said...

I understand where you're coming from here, Ginny, and personally I think you're right. The trouble is, I suppose that everyone has their own view about what love means, and those views aren't necessarily going to sit side by side very happily.

I like that quote, incidentally - who's it by?

9:48 am  
Blogger fjl said...

Hi Ginny.
Men often react spontaneously to a request to help as though that was what was being asked, whereas we women would rather have signs of a more secure, long term commitment, it seems. Fundamental sex differences again. For most guys I've been with, proactive help with needs that glaringly need to be met resolves problems permanently. (It's like throwing a ball to a dog. Spontenaety is all). Trouble is, it doesn't. We women need to keep our no claims bonus. :-)
I think you put it really well x

9:10 pm  
Blogger Rick said...

Sigh no more ladies,
Sigh no more,
Men were deceivers ever,
One foot in sea,
And one on shore,
To one thing constant never,
Then sigh not so,
But let them go,
And be you blithe and bonny,
Converting all your sounds of woe, Into hey nonny nonny!

2:41 pm  
Blogger Mine is a Gin said...

Kim - thanks for popping in. I'll look forward to seeing you again.

Wdky - sometimes I wonder whether it is possible to really be in synch. But then maybe that's part of the magic when it does happen!
Oh, and the quote's by John Ruskin

Fjl - thanks & I know what you mean

Marcus - Shakespear hasn't something for every occasion, don't you think?

2:52 pm  
Blogger Rick said...

He's so clever...

I, under duress, had to play Claudio yesterday for an assignment. What did I learn...I stink. ;-)

2:55 pm  
Blogger Rick said...

I'm currently conducting a study involving ... well, I'm quite sure you're not interested in all that; however, while waiting for my participants I had some time to reacquaint myself with your blog.

my participant just showed...more later.

3:15 pm  
Blogger Rick said...

Ok...

You seem very intelligent. I am intrigued by this...if I may ask, what is your educational background?

4:06 pm  
Blogger fjl said...

Love that poem Marcus, my sentiments exactly, as anyone here will tell you- though these were perhaps never best defined by a 'hey nonny nonny'.

7:12 pm  

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